I Put My Eyes Inside of Myself and Guess What I Found?

If you are open, or ready, you will hear me today 🙂  This is big.  And kinda deep.  Be forewarned you may find your own life’s question here today!

The Truth to everything I needed to know about myself was inside of me all along.  I just didn’t dare look.  Based on the harshness of my upbringing, and cruel tapes I continued to play regarding my horrible self (in my mind) how could I comfortably look inside of me without risking finding I am the devil incarnate or something worse?

After I closed my eyes, plugged my nose, and jumped in to myself, instead of finding Ted Bundy’s sister, I found a vision of beauty.  I found my core intentions are usually about a pure as they could get!  I see flaws, I see many mistakes, and when I put it into proportion to my story, I feel instant forgiveness!   Today when I look at myself I see more awesomeness than the bad stuff!  What I thought would be the most painful thing to do, ended up being the easiest ride I’ve had my entire life!  Easy, and addicting and healthy!

Sometimes investigating our feelings and behaviors is the hardest thing to do.  Our disturbance makes us feel moody, off balance, uncertain.  Soon enough the negative (dark) emotions overtake the good light and energy from our always decaying bodies.  They weigh heavy on our heart, spirit, soul, that we can hardly function sometimes.  Feelings can become a physical sickness if the root of the disturbance is never brought to light. It can be terminal by accident, homicide or suicide, or death by utter heartbreak.

Anger.  Fear.  Worry.  Guilt.  Shame.  Jealousy.  Envy.  Self loathing. Insecurity.  These are our enemies.  This is stress and anxiety right there.  These are our demons that have to be conquered to feel well emotionally.  And what do we do?  We keep feeding them.  We allow them to reside inside of ourselves for long periods of time.  The energy suckers just keep getting bigger and bigger creating havoc and conflict and covering up our actual strong, beautiful, amazing selves.

Some people think our emotions are impossible to be rid of because they are a part of our being, our core.  And some say I am asking too much.   The nay-sayers swear emotions are created by something not in their control.  Serotonin or a person did it too us.  Not so grasshopper, not so.  If you can imagine the worst, the way you are, you can imagine the best!  You have always had full control but no one ever told you that.  They said you were sick, or a hopeless sinner.  They judged you with their vivid imagination.  And you allowed your imagination to see the same bullshit someone else told you was wrong.  Your thinking, feelings, emotions…all learned imaginary beliefs, or made up by yourself.

Our God-given purity is so encased in negative and disruptive emotions we hardly know our true selves anymore.  We begin to act out.  Alcohol, pot, and anti-depressant abuse takes over until our brains are so nicely flat-lined, we just don’t care anymore.  We become apathetic to our living situations. Our hell.  We get use to it.  It becomes as real as anything solid to us.  My message is that we are held back only by our limited belief systems.  Me…you…all of us are in this together.  Most of us have indulged in the feel-good quick fix, am I lying?

If we learned how to deal with our troubling emotions, and allowed ourselves to be completely honest, we would all be walking around free with a heart full of passion and a head full of gratitude instead of all of this stress and anxiety.

I want you to do something (please).  Take your most troublesome emotion.   Name one.  Look closely at what it is, and what it means.  Do you own it or is it a lie you have accepted into yourself?  For example, if you are walking around with a heavy heart of guilt, or shame, put it up to the light of day and take a good hard look at it.  Do you own that?  Do you deserve a lifetime of self-abuse because you are to be ashamed of yourself, or guilty for some infraction during your life?  Did you do it deliberately?  Is it something you can change?  Was your intention to harm some one or some thing?  If not, what, exactly, are you holding onto the shame or guilt for???

Are you filled with fear and anxiety?  What is going on there I wonder?!  Look inside, you know it, you remember everything.  Once you find the Truth in the emotion your symptoms will diminish instantly because you will know exactly what to do to ‘solve’ the problem, or you may there is nothing to do about it at all.  Inside of your true core self you will find you are innocent, safe, and in control of everything, and the renewed power feels GREAT!

When you finally allow the truth to surface in the face of your feelings, you will be AMAZED at how beautiful, and wonderful, the Truth really is!  You were never suppose to give up!  The subject is even crazy to consider, isn’t it?  If you are so foreign to the rest of us humans and you care to punish yourself forever that is another matter.  Then you have to go inside and find out why you beat yourself so harshly for your human frailties.  Sure, figure out what it is you need to change about yourself.  Admit it.  Own it.  And now stop it.  Done.  It really is that simple, and you really do have that much control over yourself.  Have you given yourself life for this infraction?  Is that appropriate?   We are but a sum of learned thinking and feeling.  We are better than whatever that looks and feels like.

Through the ages we have been brainwashed by either pharmaceutical commercials or religious organizations to believe we have no control over our emotional or physical well being.  That God or drugs will save us, nothing else.   I am saying we are trained, generation before generation since the beginning of time that we are NOT to depend on our own good common sense!  We are sinners!  We are Sick!  Only GOD or Effexor will bring you back to life, depending on your belief system.   The trouble is, these are lies for most of the population in emotional trouble!   Our very own girl (or boy) inside is pure, healthy, fit, powerful, confident, and in control of everything.   Not only that, we are really filled with love, compassion and JOY!  In every generation before us higher powers have tried (and really succeeded didn’t they?) to take our gift of free will (control over selves) away in the name of power, control, money.  W to believe in something other than ourselves and that is the worst mistake a spirit can make…believing it!

The more lies, secrets, shame we stuff, the more we lose of that better part of ourselves.   The more we lose our light.

Let’s look at another emotion you may be harboring, driving yourself crazy with.  Anger.  I was once told by a mentor of mine, years ago, that any anger I hang onto, is anger at myself and myself alone.  I said that makes no sense.  Someone did me wrong, robbed me, and I can be angry, right?  She said, “Right.”  For a minute.  Then you deal with it, talk about it, get it out in the open – or end something you have no control over.  Anything after that is you, and you need to see what you are so mad at yourself for.  Chances are it will be something like you picked him, or stayed too long, or didn’t speak up, or could have moved and didn’t…you get my meaning.  All emotions belong solely to the beholder.  Think about the last time you were angry for a long period of time at someone, or some situation.  It stuck to you like a stickly black toxic poison and you allowed it to stay a while.  I’ll tell you why.  You did something wrong and were mad at yourself.  Done.  Owning your stuff is the key to ending the free rent for enemy feelings.  The next thing to do is forgive yourself and decide to do it even better next time.  Learn, let go, live.  We are born to make mistakes, we are not A mistake!

But you see here is the problem:  Many of us were raised in situations that created negative tapes in our heads.  We learned to play these tapes, over and over and over in our own little vulnerable minds, beating the living life out of ourselves, because of these messages we learned to think, “I am stupid.”  “I am ugly.”  “I am too ____.”  or my favorite of all, “I am _____,”.  Name your judgment because that is all it is…a learned judgment.  They are not facts.  They have no power because they are not real.  They are the figment of the imagination, typically brought on by an experience, an outside judgment, or a series of experiences that made our minds add one and one and come up with something not true.  And then we feed that to oblivion sometimes.

Today is a good day to take a peek at what is really going on inside.  Pull out any emotion you choose, and decide you are done feeling it.  Look at it carefully, examine all sides.  If it is yours, do something about it.  If it is not yours, or if it is not a proven fact, shift your imagination to something else.  Something better for yourself.  It all starts with a new thought, the seed of everything.

Wishing everyone reading this love, peace and light.

Cherylann Thomas

http://www.mindmiracleshypnotherapy.ca

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Cherylann Thomas is a Clinical Hypnotherapist registered with the International Medical and Dental Hypnotherapy Association operating a successful hypnotherapy practice in West Kelowna, British Columbia.  Skype Service is available.

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